I love my family.

Happiness is when your Grammy dances to Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance" with you on Christmas Eve. And does a chest bump at the end.

Ga ga oooh la la.

Dedicated to Sophie.

Alright, Soph, this one's for you.

Today at work, Dallas came in to talk to me instead of sitting in the basement with our older maintenance gentlemen, Gary and Charlie.

One subject leads to another, and Dallas confesses that he got really mad at me once. I tried to rack my brain really fast to see if I could remember something that might have burst his bubble, but couldn't come up with anything. So, I straight up asked him what it was. He said he was "pissed" because I teased him about "going down to sit with the guys and doing a whole lot of nothing."

(Psh, well its true.) In immediate response to that I said, "Dallas. Don't be so sensitive."

Whoops.

Later on Charlie came upstairs to chat with me.

Now let me tell you something about Charlie: not only does he like to chat, he likes to chat in hick, which results in this kind of uncomprehensible mumble. I do a mean Charlie impersonation, ask sometime... I'll demonstrate. When he first started working at the Cove, I had to stare really hard at his mouth (which is covered by an impressive stache) to pick up any of what he was saying and just nod along in affirmation. I am proud to say that I am now fluent in Charlie.

Background info on Charlie:

• Full name: Charles Brown a.k.a. Charlie Brown.
• Has a rad looking tat on his forearm of a skull and some kind of serpent.
• Served for a lot of years in the army.
• He wears purely flannel button-ups (I know, right?).
• Loves hunting more than anything.
• He calls me "Sunshine" because "yer always smilin' errytime I get up 'round these parts no matter what kinda days go'n on." (When in all actuality, its because he can't remember my name- Dallas has confirmed.)

Today when Charlie comes up for our usual afternoon chat session, he had a picture. A picture that he printed off of facebook. A picture that he printed off of facebook of his twelve-year-old granddaughter, who shot her first buck. I am dead serious. TWELVE YEARS OLD. No joke. I was exceedingly amazed. He then told me about how he persuaded her to give him the meat after she mounts it. Yes, he promised that he was going to bring in some deer jerky for me. Apparently, he makes the best deer jerky this side of the Mississippi.

So. There you go.

P.S. Sophie- can we talk about how easy it is for me to call you by your internet pseudonym??? I count three times so far. What the weird?

Birds of a feather.

We flock together.

GO AWAY.

Last night, I had a dream. It was one of those real confusing dreams where you can't tell if its reality or not.

I was walking from my basement room upstairs to the kitchen to get some peanut butter, naturally. When I got to the top of the stairs I saw Xerxes, our resident Husky. For some reason, I wasn't sure it was Xerxes all of the sudden and got really freaked out. It was pretty dark up there.

I ran downstairs and jumped in my bed. I pulled my quilt over my head and was totally covered except for my hand, which was hanging over the edge of the bed.

Of course, the dog ran after me and came right up to my bed and starting sniffing around slash breathing heavily slash panting. The mystery dog started to lick my hand and I was terrified to even move. I didn't want him to know I was alive, because obviously if he knew I was alive, he'd attack.

I started to realize what an irrational idea this was, so in my most commanding, master voice I yell at the dog, "GO AWAY!"

And I woke myself up. Yeah. I literally yelled that outloud. Loud enough that I woke myself up out of that weird dream sleep.

So there you go.

NINE.

Just for the record:

The blue/vanilla Tootsie Roll count today was nine. NINE!

Thanks, Bonnie.

Work has been pretty slow lately. Don't get me wrong, I love my job. The people I work with are fantastic (shout-out to Nancy and Donetta). But here's the thing... as some of you may know, there's not a lot to do between one rent week and the next. So to get me through, here are some of the things that I like to do:

• After all the initial message-checking and maintenance-requesting is done, I watch the Bonnie Hunt Show. I think she is hilarious and she has def got me through some sleepy times. I'm looking forward to tomorrow's show because David Alan Greer is going to be on. (They worked together in the movie "Jumanji." A personal childhood fave.) I don't know what I'd do without her every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from 2 to 3 p.m.
  
• I sanitize and re-sanitize the counters, phone, and anything else that may come into contact with sickies.
• Eat various candies ranging from salt water taffy to Airheads to Tootsie Rolls. Sometimes, Dallas (my boss's son who also works maintenance) and I like to see who can get the most vanilla or blue Tootsie Rolls. They are a rarity. One time I found three in one day. THREE.
• Read, if at all possible. Currently thumbing through East of Eden, Prince Caspian, and The Undaunted.
• Make to-do lists. I often end up having seventeen different variations of the same list by the end of the week.
• Sing to myself. I used to have two different speakers for my iPod, but both crapped out on me. So in an effort to not waste another thirty bucks on cheap technology from China, I often find myself singing whatever comes to mind. Out loud. Yes, I have had a couple of concerned-looking tenants walk in on me. Tevs.
• And.... that's about it. Exciting, eh?

P.S. This post dedicated to Mallory Ann Lee Green. Thanks, Mal, for constantly bringing to my attention my lack of blogging. I hope you like it.

Not my strong point.

I think that we can all agree that blogging is not my strong point. I mean, the "Black Heart" post was up for so long that I couldn't stand looking at that irritating orange background for one more second. I had to axe it.

So, thanks to Linds, I was inspired to do some revamping and I'm feeling pretty good about where this is headed.

I'll try to keep things interesting.

I bought a chair.

Disclaimer: beauty is in the eye of the beholder.


And I behold that this chair is beautiful (in a slightly hideous way). What can I say? For some reason, I have a love for interesante furniture that is made circa the nineteen seventies.

Some of you may or may not believe that furniture from the seventies should have stayed in the decade that they came from, this chair being no exception. But I'm glad some of them do survive.

Noni and I stumbled upon this little beaut at Saver's last week. I couldn't pass it up. The pattern, the fabric, the color, the comfort, the price! Its the perfect chair to last for the college years. There was a sofa in a matching print, but I am not yet able to make such accomodations. It was sad to split the set up. (Sorry guys--- when Ken and Mal helped us move the chair the next day, an Emily had already snagged the couch.)

So there you go. I am the proud owner of this chair, my first furniture purchase. Hideous or not, I love it!

Produce is the answer.

Brown and I were philosophizing late last night and it occurred to us: Produce is the answer. On so many levels.

Seriously. Lets talk about the benefits.

Glowing skin, antioxidants, healthy bodies, boosts your immune system, gives you energy, lowers your risk of heart disease, strokes, and cancers... The benefits go on and on and on. Your body will love you for eating your 5-a-day combo servings of fruit and veggies.

The benefits aren't simply health-related. When we came up with this mantra, we had no idea that we basically foretold events that would happen the very next day. I mean, who knows who/what the produce section at Macy's will hold? Right, Brown?

Say yes to slow food and no to the fast stuff. You will be happy.

Funk is the problem and the solution.

Definitely the theme of the Seattle trip. Funk. (Props to Wayne for the great mixes.)

Well... if it wasn't funk than it was food. Either way, we were set to jet.

Here are a couple of gems from the trip:


My team. They showed up in Seattle at the Folklife Festival. Don't you fret: they have a website.


This is my favorite picture of the group. Mostly because we are all eating in it, as per usual. We ate our way through Seattle and loved every second of it.

Please pay attention to the man on the left (thanks to Elise for being a decoy). One of my favorite things about big cities is that you can dress however crazyweird you want and you'll look more normal than 80% of the population. Seattle was no exception. This little photo helps to display that fact beautifully.

Nine hundred miles.

Please bless that today is filled with zen and serenity and fun and safety.

And also friendship.

I love roadtrips.

She's huge but she's hilarious.

That's what one of my bosses said to me about my only co-worker.

It's really true though. That's the best part.

Boss-lady is frank about most situations and has no problem speaking her mind. She also loves action films and a good gossip sesh. She is determined that I will meet my husband through work. After all, that's how it happened for her daughter.

My other boss gave me a warning that said huge but hilarious co-worker (who shall hereafter be called HBH) is "excitable, so be prepared for that." Yesterday, she actually told HBH that she was "getting all red in the face" and that she needed to "drink some water and go to the bathroom." Mrs. Boss has a smoker's rasp and calls me "honey." She can't handle new technology (and yet her favorite new flick is Star Trek). She about fired me because I couldn't remember if I had actually ever used a typewriter before. We have to use handwritten, carbon-copy receipts for all transactions in the office.

But I'm not complaining... C. Cove's filing system is why I have a job. So bring on the ledgers! I can make a hand-written account like nobody's business.

There will be more to come on HBH. Don't you fret.

BAND-AID(E).

I should have been born in the seventies. For the music, the style and clothes, the excitement...

I think I would've loved it there.

P.S. Did you know that Cat Stevens changed his name to Yusuf Islam, but his birth name is Steven Demetre Georgiou??? I know, kuh raise eee. Check this out.

No, excuse me.

There was a man in the women's restroom last night. Uh huh, a man. A buzz-cut, basketball shorts-wearing man.

Instead of high tailing it out of there or hiding in the stall till he heard everyone leave when he realized he was in the wrong bathroom (what I would mos def do), he saunters out of the stall with an "excuse me," while my roommate and I try not to awkwardly stare at him as he washes his hands.

After he left, we had to double check that we weren't in the men's room. Luckily, I have amazing deductive reasoning skills and assured everyone that the lack of urinals could only mean one thing.

I'm pretty sure that he was a little bit crazy. Or a creeper.

It was hilarious.

This post dedicated to Noni.

Noni grabbed a huge, bald man's head tonight. But it's okay because "he likes little girls."


Because you're so great N, here is a little picture for you (and maybe for me a little bit). Ironic that our crush crushes on older women and you grab older men:


Stone fold cox. It was love at first plaid.

Jabari, Shakir, and Kossom.

A while back I made a trip to Wal-Mart. Long story short, I ended up buying myself and all of my roommates tall tees. That's right. Tall to the tees.

And this is what happened last night:




I know you guys are probably dying for more, but this is all that is currently available to the public.

Sweet, sweet manna.

Went to TX Roadhouse grill today with my sis and my roommate Brookie. It is an excellent establishment--- I definitely give it an 'exceeds expectations.' The Roadhouse can seem a little daunting and/or greasy (?) based on outward appearances. But you won't be disappointed if you get beyond the surface. It is tacky yet unrefined in a way suitable for families. Instead of having some lame free appetizer like popcorn or chips, they give you the warmest, sweetest, most moist rolls with homemade cinnabutter. They are free of charge and they keep 'em coming all night! No joke, these rolls are the food of the Gods. Manna sent down from the Heavens... to a white T restaurant chain. Each of us consumed four rolls at an alarming rate. Yeah, we asked for to-go boxes five minutes after they brought our dinner out. It was worth it.

I also managed to spend $86 when I had only planned on spending nothing at all. And on what else but some sweet summa threads. This shopping trip I found twelve jazzy pieces and loved pretty much everything I tried on (love and hate when that happens). I had to hem and haw over everything and still managed to purchase eight out of the twelve items that I picked up. I can't wait to start wearing them just as soon as it heats up. (Idiot UT weather--- its almost MAY for crapssake, I need the sun!)

Never duck walk.

This weekend has been pretty good.

Things I've done:

• Drove to Las Vegas with my cousin Trisha, who has the best advice ever (see video below). During said car ride, we sang and danced to Kidz Bop. Kidz Bop = really horrible renditions of today's greatest pop hits sung by children. Our fave was "Since U Been Gone" by Kelly Clarkson, sung by weird little children.

• Been inducted into "(T)ain't Your Mother's Book Club." As a new member, you are required to sign the club creed and read the book called Porn for Women (look it up... on Amazon, not the world wide web). It is found to be more hilarious when reading the book while taking shots of helium.
• Had my favorite dessert ever ever. Chocolate strawberries. Funny story about this: When my aunt Steph whipped out the chocolate strawberries and started handing them out, I was practically on my third when Trisha pipes up and says: "I can't have chocolate all the time. Too much is not good for your body." So my mom tells her that its okay to have it once in a blue moon. Trish then marches outside without a word. She comes back and says, "Yep, the moon is blue moon. I can have chocolate tonight!" I love Trish. She's so sweet and innocent, and she has the BEST sense of humor.
• Slept in my bed. I fell asleep in point five seconds and remained in the same position the whole night. If you've ever had the unfortunate opportunity of sharing a bed with me, you know what a rare occurence this is.
• Went to the Rec center with my whole family. Brother sister mom dad and grammy. We all worked out together. Up in the gym just working on our fitness... together.
• Jammed out wtih Kk on Joaquin's electric guitar while singing at the top of our lungs.

This weekend has been great, but I can't wait to get back to the summer that I've been longing for.

(See Noni's post on summer and you'll understand.)

Last day.

I've been to the Cannon Center for the 2nd time in two weeks. Today, I went with Mal and Chi for a little pre-celebratory-school's-over outing.



Embarrassing? Maybe. Worth it? Definitely.

Plus, I get half-off since I'm a food & dining services employee. So thanks, Cecil.

I will admit that the first time.... uh-mazing. I never wanted to leave. This 2nd time wasn't as magical though. But I am just as satisfied.

Its hard to study on a full stomach. I just want to nap.

P.S. The musicdance reference library is uh-may-zing. Shout out to the awesome furniture and drapes. I want to make a dress out of those drapes.

Fortune cookie'd.

So I was cleaning through my wallet today and I found a little gem: a fortune. The cookie kind of fortune, which happens to be the best kind in my opinion.

It says, "An admirer is concealing their affection for you."

Apparently, that affection is buried so deep my admirer doesn't even know it exists. I am tempted to play that game that everyone plays, where you add either an "in the outhouse" or a "between the sheets." Needless to say, that game ends up having some less than satisfactory results a.k.a. disgusting.

On a better note, here are my lucky lotto numbers from said fortune: 10 13 18 22 33 48. I'm thinking about a roadtrip to Idaho.

What do you say, Brown? Sophie???

To my public.

I'm making my World Wide Web debut. Be nice.

With love.